Metro-Hockers

Posted on +00002006-07-20T03:17:12+00:00312006bUTCThu, 20 Jul 2006 03:17:12 +0000 5, 206

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While trying to pick the chicken peices lodged between my teeth unsuccessfully due to the lack of tools at hand- I had n epiphany. There I was trying to utilize my napkin and middle finger as a toothpick at the infamous Dougies, and low and behold a semi-yeshivish, semi hocker, semi metro sexual stood before me talking to the table to the side. He had those sleek, sexy, black rimed glasses, the type that look like they came off a modern art sculpture. His shirt was perfectly starched and tucked in to his pleated gray pants. On his larger then life belt stood a phone/blackberry/palm pilot/ sort of thing. He spoke with a Hocker air. “You know shmuley, from ave O said he can hook me up”, “Yeh and I know this guy Yankel Bernstein from Baltimore who sells used Lexuses”. Yeh he had that kind of speak.

My mouth hung open at the thought of my brilliantness. Long forgotten chicken chunks stuck willingly to the gums they were invading, while I thought of the anoomolly before me. A Metro-Sexual Hocker, aha a metro-hocker. That is how the Metro-Hocker came to be. 

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